New School for Ian

Last week, Ian started at a Korean preschool. It is an English-speaking school for Korean kids and employs a lot of foreign teachers. A bunch of kids from Ian's on Post preschools switched at the same time. It was sad to leave because I like Mustard Seed and CDC, but it is only three hours a day which isn't enough time for me to do anything and dominates my schedule. The bus picks the kids up before 9am and drops them off before 3pm. Another mom and I have been splitting a nanny once a week for our little kids. We went to Insadong last week and this week we went to a luncheon. The school teaches English reading and writing, Korean reading and writing, math, science, art and more. Not sure how much the American kids are getting out of it, yet because we don't push reading and writing as early as the Koreans do, but I'm sure after a few months we'll see some growth. They feed them lunch and snacks at school and all we have to do is wash the lunch tray. I haven't even had to do that because they haven't sent it home, yet. Their school backpacks come home with a communication journal every day where the teacher can let us know what the kids are doing and we can ask questions. All the American kids seem to be liking the school and adjusting well. And the moms sure love the new schedule!

Yesterday Sex, Today Death

So yesterday Ian hits us with,"I want to talk about sex," and today he picked Bambi off the shelf for me to read to him at storytime.

Ya know, the story about the little deer whose mother gets shot by the hunters. The book doesn't show Bambi's mom die, just tells you that it happened and on the next page Bambi appears with his father.

"What happened to Bambi's mother?"

"She died. The hunters shot her."

"Why did they do that? They shouldn't do that?"

"They wanted to eat her."

"You're not supposed to eat somebody's mom. I need to get in those pages and stop the bad guys from shooting her."

Think we might be going vegan. Until Curt makes ribs again.

Fire Fighters!

It is Fire Safety Week and the Yongsan Firefighters visited the Preschool. The kids got to sit in the driver's seat and squirt the hose. Ian is obsessed with water guns, but he did not want to try the hose.

The ER, My New Home

So, yesterday started off great with Ian waking up in his own room. We met some friends at the Hannam pool and were back home in time for lunch. Ian fell asleep in his highchair after eating his lunch and took a nice nap, on-time. When he woke up, I decided to reward him with a trip to the playground instead of the much-needed trip to the Commissary for groceries. He put on his helmet and we took his bike outside. He rode around for awhile and then wanted to play at the playground. Some of the bigger kids saw his bike and wanted to see how it worked. He was so excited that he jumped and his bike and started gilding before he was really on the bike. He fell and split his chin open. So, back to the ER for the 3rd time in just over 30 days.

It was a gusher! One of the ladies at the playground gave me a paper towel, but it kept bleeding. A kind woman named Elizabeth helped me get Eva and the bike back to my building while I took care of Ian. I couldn't find my door card to get into the building (story of my life), but a halmoni let us in. By the time we got to the apartment he had stopped bleeding, but since the wound was gaping, I decided to take him to the ER.

There wasn't much activity there so we were seen quickly. They put a numbing gel on his chin and we sat for 20 minutes while it took effect. Well, I sat. Ian climbed and jumped and tried to find electric sockets to stick his fingers in (well, not the last one, but you get the idea). Then, they brought us back to the room for the stitches. Curt arrived about this time. Ian was very calmed and listened well as they wrapped him in a sheet to restrain him. They asked me if I thought he'd lay still and I said maybe if he is numb, but I doubted it. With his head injury, he was hysterical until I nursed him and then he went totally limp and relaxed, but I couldn't nurse him during chin stitches so we went with restraint. He looked like he was in a zen state as they wrapped him and irrigated the wound. Then, they injected the lyodocaine and hot tears and primal screams followed. His eyes were searching wildly for me and he screamed,"Mommy-ah, come get me! Don't stay away!"

I got as close as I could, but a medic was holding his head and the doctor was injecting and stitching his face. I had an urge to cry but stopped myself because that would just make it worse for him. Finally, Ian said,"Mommy hold my hand!"

I grabbed his hand through the sheet and said,"I've got it. I've got your hand." He calmed instantly.

Then, it was over.

Surprisingly, this trauma had little effect on night #2 in his own room. We did his routine. He smiled and said,"I think you should sleep with me in this bed."
I said,"I have to sleep in my own bed. this is your special bed. It is just for you."

And then he went to sleep.

Coffee Date and Bowling

Because of Ian's head wound, we couldn't go to the pool yesterday. After canceling swim lessons for this session, we were sitting in the car trying to decide where to go and Ian said,"You need a coffee and I need a croissant. Drive up the hill to Starbucks."

So, I did.


After he ate his croissant, he begged to go to the pool. Oh how I would have loved to go to the pool yesterday, but the doctor said to stay out for 24-48 hours. So, we went bowling instead.

We bowled 5 games. We had the bumpers up and Ian used the ramp. He got several spares! Eva slept in the carseat carrier and then watched us bowl from it until she got bored. Then, I bowled with her in the Beco. We got a strike!

Basketball Hoop

We just bought a Little Tikes Basketball Hoop to give him something to do indoors on yellow sand and rainy days. He loves it! It adjusts up to 6 feet tall so it should last. It is not electronic and does not require batteries or make noise. It is just a simple hoop. Curt did have to tape the net on so it would stay, but it is pretty stable and Ian is having lots of fun.

Potty Break Through!

Ian has been great with potty training. We've been following my strategy and it seems to be working. After mastering being out in public and staying dry, Ian stopped pooping in the potty and started pooping in his pants. He went to the hourly daycare center for 3 hours and pooped in his pants twice! Then, they finally put a Pull-Up on him (I don't use Pull-Ups) and when he got home, he pooped in the Pull-Up and said,"It's ok this is a diaper (the reason I don't use Pull-Ups)."

It was really hard not to react or bribe or threaten. It was frustrating because he pooped on the potty before he peed. As we went to the bathroom to clean up he would laugh and say,"I'm not supposed to poop in my underwear, I 'm supposed to poop on the potty."

All I said was,"You will just keep practicing and you will get it."

When he asks about going to school, I say,"You have to be able to go on the potty before you go to school. We'll keep practicing and you will get it."

That way it is his choice with no pressure. I don't hang it over his head. He needs to have control over his body. I can't ask him if he wants to go or just take him to the potty because he will refuse. I deal with getting him to go by incorporating potty time into our routines: first thing you do when you get up, last thing you do before bed, last thing you do before you leave the house, first thing you do when you get to your destination. He likes knowing what he is supposed to do and if I give a reason for the potty time and go myself, he doesn't feel controlled or pressured. The rest of the time, I try to wait for him to say he has to go unless I see a pee pee dance happening. It is hard not to keep asking, but I really try to restrain myself and if he says he doesn't have to go, I don't force him to out of the routine times.

So, I am surviving potty training quite well. Almost makes me want to explore Elimination Communication. I've always said that it isn't for me and I still don't think I'd want to do it full time, but it might work well for Eva because she seems to be bothered by being wet or dirty. Ian never cared. My friend, Caroline, is pregnant with her first and planning on doing it.

Happy Mother's Day

Christmas 2008

We started off at my parents' house where the big hits were a new tricycle and the wrapping paper:




We went to brunch at my grandparents' house and then headed to Ohio to see Curt's mom.


We drove back to Erie on Saturday and then to see my cousin outside of Pittsburgh on Sunday. He is with my brother Matt in this picture. We didn't get as many pictures as we should.

More Potty Progress

Since his first poop on the potty, Ian has pooped a couple times. It has always been a very small amount with lots of encouragement. Today, though, he said he wanted to pee on the potty. I took his diaper off and he went to sit. After awhile I lost interest and asked him if he was finished.

"No. I gonna poop on the potty."

I went to go to an online SuDoKu puzzle and left him to sit. (His potty is in the livingroom room). Next thing I know, he says,"I needa dump dis poop". I check it out and he has made a big poop and peed in the potty. We cheered, dumped and flushed. The hope for major potty progress at Montessori is growing. He starts in January. That would be awesome if he would start going regularly.

Partying at the Dragon

Ian had a birthday party today at Dragon Hill Lodge. There was a balloon maker and a face painter for the kids. I got Ian a balloon dog, but all the other boys got swords so he looked a little pathetic trying to sword fight with a small poodle so he got a sword as well. The line was long for the face painting. They did a really nice job, but Ian was having fun with the balloon sword so we skipped it. He was the only boy who was dressed up. Most of the girls were in party dresses but the boys were casual. He wore his thrift store suit and looked snazzy. It was a little big, but we have Thanksgiving, Christmas and possibly family pictures in March after the baby is born to try to get use out if it, so hopefully it will last through those events.
Here is Ian, sword-fighting with the birthday girl.

Haircut

Ian got a haircut on Sunday. He looks thinner afterwards.

Some funny things that he has said lately:

He said,"I hab a headache. I need ice."

I was hugging Curt and he said,"Get off! Do your e-mail!"

I said,"Obama is the new president."

He said,"No! He's MY president."

Sweet Innocence

Today, Ian took some legos with him as we took the dog outside. He dropped them and when he picked them up and re-formed them, they were in the shape of a gun. He didn't realize it, though. He doesn't shoot things. I have to comment on this because I know the day is near where everything will be a gun. Little boys tend to do this as soon as they discover the concept. It is just nice that we made it until he is over 2 without guns.

Other examples:

1. He sleeps with a baby doll. He doesn't know that "dolls are for girls".

2. He chose a purple balloon with theatre masks on it at the Yongsan Fall Fest. He doesn't know that "pink and purple are for girls".

3. He went to the doctor today to get his Flu Mist. He isn't afraid of the doctor.

4. He only knows Signing Time, Sesame Street, Barack Obama and John McCain from television (the last two, mostly like from the Daily Show/Colbert Report). People ask him about Dora the Explorer, Bob the Builder, and the Wiggles and he just stares blankly. He doesn't know any of the Disney movies and has never watched a movie. Again, I know this is coming to an end soon. However, I appreciate the fact that I can dress him in my style, with almost no licenced character clothing, bedding or paraphernalia. He has a pair of Elmo overalls and a Barack Obama t-shirt. He has Elmo pjs but he outgrew them.

5. He doesn't feel excluded or ostracized or inferior in any way to any kids. I know that, too, will end shortly. Three and four year olds are mean! Today at the playground an older boy yelled at him and he yelled back louder. The boy went crying to his mother, but later pushed Ian off the steering wheel on the play structure. I didn't see it but Ian was crying and the kid had a maniacal look in his eye. Still, he got over it very quickly and was re-directed. He was upset but didn't take it personally. Sweet innocence.

Let There Be Poop...

On the potty!

Ian pooped on the potty for the first time tonight and he did it as Curt was walking through the door so he got to witness. Curt preserved Ian's dignity by telling me,"No pictures." I was going to take a picture. Yeah, that's gross.

My approach to potty training is very laid back. We've been talking about the potty for awhile and this summer I bought a potty. We keep it in the livingroom and he sits on it when he wants to. He pooped on it once before because I caught him doing it and put him on it, but he hasn't peed, yet. Today was the first time that he said,"I need to poop." His diaper had been falling off so I told him to take it off and try to pee on the potty. He did that and then came back and said he needed to poop so I said,"Go sit on the potty!" We went over together and he sat down. I put his feet up on the seat so it would be easier to find the muscles to control the pooping and said,"Push the poop in the potty." He pushed and got a little air. We cheered and he said,"More?" and did it a few more times before the poop started coming out. Curt walked in the door just as he was doing it, We cheered again, he carried it to the big toilet, dumped in it and flushed.

I don't expect him to start pooping on the potty regularly, but that is definitely progress. It would be really cool if he did, though!

I Voted!

Ian watching the Katie Couric interview of Sarah Palin

Terror on the Set!

Ian had a modeling job on Monday. The little girl he was paired with had a rough day. Ian did o.k. despite the fact that they wanted them to do things that were a little difficult for little kids. By then, they took Ian into another studio and he turned on the charm. He could have kept going, but the only things left for him were two outfits that were meant to be shot with the little girl. The little girl was done and just not having it, so they decided to bring Ian back on Friday with another little girl. As we walked out to the agent's car, we realized it had been towed with our carseat in it. So we took a cab back to the base. Luckily, that was Ian's extra carseat. It was a rough day for the agent.

That bring us to today.

Ian was a terror and totally uncooperative. Crying and laying on the floor. Part of the problem is that they are shooting winter clothes and they get too hot. This shoot was also really early and he didn't get a proper breakfast. Whatever it was today, he was not having any of it. They had to shoot two outfits and they might have gotten something that they can photo shop, but he was awful. The other little girl was wonderful today, so it wasn't a total loss. Now kids have good days and days. He usually does much better than this.

But here's the kicker: We are walking out after an exhausting attempt to get him to cooperate. He gets into the elevator and says,"Had fun."

I said,"What did you say?"

He said,"Had fun. Dat fun."

Ovations!

I'm not much of a singer. In second grade, they picked kids for a school choir and I wasn't chosen. I didn't sing out loud, even by myself until my junior year of high school when I had to sing to audition for a theatre group. I got in, but I didn't sing in the group.

When I was pregnant with Ian, I took a few singing lessons at Mercyhurst College from an elderly nun named Sister Helen Jean. She was incredibly gifted at explaining abstract concepts in concrete terms, like how to visualize in order to get a better sound. She really helped me. I wasn't trying to be an opera quality singer, like Mercyhurst specializes in, I just wanted to be able to sing to my baby without embarrassment.

Little did I know that every Mommy & Me activity from swimming to gymnastics would involve parental singing. Little kids don't sing so if the parents don't help out the teacher, the teacher is on her own. Many parents are shy about singing, but since I had my lessons, I try to sing loudly so others feel comfortable joining in. I do this in yoga as well with chanting, because many people are uncomfortable with it.

What is wonderful about singing to Ian is that he says"Yay!" after I sing a song he likes. What appreciation!

I do want him to have music in his life. I do not play any instruments or sing very well and I really think I am missing out. I wish we were the family that gets the guitar out after dinner and sings, but Curt doesn't play any instruments either. Maybe guitar is another hobby I can take up someday...

Riding in the Park

Sunday we took Ian took to one of the parks by the Han river. They are all called Hangang Park (Han River Park). He practiced riding his bike. He has a Strider Balance Bike. Balance bikes do not have pedals or training wheels. The theory is that training wheels do not teach balance. With the balance bike, kids teach themselves to balance and then it is easier to move to a regular bike with pedals and without training wheels. We are trying to get him out more to practice. It is still pretty hot, but not as miserable as before. You can see in the first part of the video that he is standing up and walking the bike, but the second part, he sits and pushes and does well with the balance. He still has a long way to go before he is ready to try a regular bike, but it is fun to watch him. Plus, the bike only weighs 7 lbs (if I remember correctly) so it is nice and light.

Things to Work on with Ian

1. Alphabet. He can sing the alphabet and remember the letters in sequence, but I don't think he can recognize individual letters. We are watching the Signing Time ABC Songs DVD. Curt picket up the Leap Frog Word Whammer Fridge Phonics Set. There is one that just has a spot for one letter, not words, but he could only find that in the Spanish version. This one will last longer anyway. That will be a birthday present. (He isn't having his party until the 27th).

2. Names. Today, he finally answered me when I asked,"What is your name?" He will point to his picture and say his name, but he isn't answering. He will answer when I ask,"What is Daddy's name?" For some reason, Curt's name sticks in his head. He will also answer when I ask,"What is the dog's name?" I want him to be able to say his full name, Curt's full name and my full name.

3. Putting on and taking off clothes. Since he is going back to Montessori, I know they will want him to be able to do these things. I don't really give him the chance, so we are going to start trying a bit.

4. Counting Objects. He can recite counting to ten but I don't think he understands what it means, yet. I do think he knows the differences between one, two and maybe three objects. I tell him that he can take two cars with him whenever we leave the house. He knows when he only has one. He had three cars one time and I asked him how many he had. He said,"Three" until I asked how many he was supposed to have and he said,"Two" and then tried to say he had two cars.

5. Riding his balance bike. His bike is a birthday gift but I ordered it early because I wanted to have it on time. It came within a week and so we gave it to him early. Unfortunately, that was during the height of summer and my nausea so he hasn't been outside with it a lot. He does ride it a bit inside, but he needs to practice outside in order to really learn to glide on it. One great thing about our American neighbors is that they are mostly military and the base requires helmets on the kids so all the military kids around here wear helmets. Ian likes his helmet as a result and will put it on around the house when he rides his bike because he has seen the other kids doing it.

I think that this will be a task will be a great opportunity for father-son bonding for Curt. If they can get outside after work for a little bit each day, I think he will get the hang of it quickly.

I did not add potty training to this list, though I may try to ask him if he wants to sit on the potty more often, but it seems like people who start earlier have to work at it longer and in the end, the may go through fewer diapers and fully potty train a little earlier than those who wait, but the work involved is too much of a pain for such a little reward, especially when you hear of potty training in a day programs for kids over 2.5 years old. If you can get to the same point in a day at 2.5 that you would get to in a year if you start at 18 months, that sounds good to me. The theory is that by 2.5, kids have the physical ability to tell when they have to go and hold it until they get to the potty and they have enough verbal skills to understand that they need to communicate about the potty.

I have a friend who started at 18 months. Her son is now almost 2.5 and still has accidents, though he is out of diapers. He wears pull ups and she is trying to transition him to underwear. I think he will be fully potty trained in a few months and he is mostly potty trained and was potty trained well before Ian will be, but she really puts a lot of effort into it. I am not criticizing her, but for me it is not worth it.

The pediatrician told me I should try to potty train Ian before the baby comes, but he will only be 2.5 when the baby comes. I am just not going to worry about it or push too hard because we can't be consistent with all the traveling we are going to have to do and after I have the baby, I do not want to be concentrating on potty training. I figure that after we get back to Korea, we can start working on it more.

Of course, if he displays interest, we will go with it. Yesterday, when he was in the tub, he asked to pee on the potty. He probably peed in the tub before he said that, but I put him on the potty anyway. Also, at the Montessori, many of the other kids will be going to the potty and the teacher said that kids often potty train themselves by watching other kids. Of course, if that happens, I will be thrilled, but again, I am not going to desperately try to get this done before the baby.

Injured at the Hospital!

At playgroup today, I heard that I might have a difficult time scheduling my appointment with Radiology for my sonogram. They suggested I go in person and schedule it to avoid language difficulties. People don't seem to answer the phone on this Post and when they do, they often hang up on you. Annoying!

So, after playgroup ended at 11:30, I drove to Apgujeong to pickup the new yoga schedule so I can start going back. (I have 24 classes to use by December 17). By the time we got back to the back it was almost 12:30, so we went for lunch. 12:00-1:00pm is usually the lunch hour, anyway. So, after lunch, I went to the hospital and scheduled my sonogram. It was easy. The lady was both quick and polite. It was shocking and a happy surprise! As I was driving home, I remembered that Ian had his 2 year old check up today! I rushed back to the hospital and was 25 minutes late for my appointment (I usually wait for over an hour to be seen, but still). As we are standing at the reception desk to see if we can still get in, Ian whacks his face into the desk and cuts his face near his eye. He was flirting with a little girl and turned away from her ad right into the desk!

Fortunately, the doctor agreed to see us and even took care of his cut. She had her nurse go to the ER to get Dermabond (superglue for wounds). She cleaned him up and glued him up. That was really awesome because she could have just sent us to the ER where we probably would have waited for hours.

The bandaid was put near his wound, but not over it because of the Dermabond. You can see the little cut.

Also, while he was in the doctors office, he bonked the top of his head on the doctor's desk! Poor guy. Poor me.